We are like fingerprints regarding our values – each of us has a different set. The same is true for our Holiday Values, which can be defined as the core principles and meanings that a holiday represents to each individual. Often, holiday values focus on themes like family connection, spiritual or religious beliefs, generosity, peace, gratitude, community, and traditions.
When you understand your values surrounding the holidays, you can make choices that align with those values. The result is a more enjoyable holiday!
We often toss around the word “values” but don’t really take the time to understand, identify, and make behavior choices based on those values. For example, we might say that Jesus is the most important part of the holiday, but reading our Bible or praying gets pushed to the bottom of the “to-do list”. Then we feel guilty and guilt creates stress.
I would challenge you to create more peace by determining your values before the holiday begins so you can live within those values and be true to yourself.
When determining your values, it’s important not to judge yourself because judgment inhibits creativity. Instead, practice curiosity, as being curious can give you positive feedback.
Ask yourself how the “Best Christmas Ever” would look for you. Here are some questions you can ask to get your creative juices flowing.
· What brings you joy?
· What are you doing when you are the happiest?
· What are you not willing to let go of during this season?
· Do you prefer a big gathering or a small and intimate celebration?
· Do you enjoy decorating?
· Do you like to bake?
· Is going to church important to you during the holiday season?
· Do you like to travel?
When reflecting on these questions, be sure your answers are true for you and not based on what you think you should want or what others say you need. We can’t live others’ values because we end up being disappointed in ourselves. And being disappointed in ourselves can cause additional stress.
Now that you have a clear picture of what is important to you during the holidays, it’s time to decide to make it happen. Identify three small steps to get you closer to the “Best Christmas Ever” that you dream about. Set up a time and place to do those three things. Remember that this process may take time. Don’t overwhelm yourself with a long list of things you must do in order to have your “Best Christmas Ever”. Start small, then next year you can add more changes. When we start too big, we often become overwhelmed and when we get overwhelmed, we tend to quit.
I encourage you to take the time to ask yourself the important questions that help you determine your Holiday Values, make a list of 3 things you can do this year to give yourself more peace, make a plan to do those things, and enjoy your “Best Christmas Ever”.
I wish you a Christmas that aligns you with your Holiday Values and gives you peace.
