You’ve tried over and over to create a new habit, like exercising daily, eating more veggies, or drinking more water. But it seems like you just can’t get anything healthy to stick! You feel like a failure when it comes to creating good habits, so you simply give up.
What if the problem isn’t you but is your process, or the way you are going about making those changes? According to B.J. Fogg, research scientist, Stanford University professor, and author of the book, Tiny Habits, it’s not you! Wow, what a relief! All these years, you thought you were lazy and unmotivated. That’s simply not true.
According to Fogg, when motivation, ability, and a prompt (or cue) come together, that’s where the magic happens. But what if you just can’t find the motivation to take the action? That’s where Tiny Habits come in.
When you are lacking motivation, simply downsize your action. Motivation and ability (or ease of doing the action) work hand in hand. When motivation is high, you can do difficult things. When motivation is low, making your action easier will help you follow through. And when you follow through, you feel better and more successful about yourself. And when you feel successful, your motivation increases. And nothing increases success and motivation more than – success and motivation!
The bottom line is --
breaking down actions into small steps can be
the difference
between success and failure.
I had a client who (before we started working together) wanted to get healthier. She decided drinking 50 ounces of water a day was a great place to start.
On Day One, she got out her dusty 16-ounce water bottle and filled it. She got that bottle down but not much more. The next day, she was only able to drink about half the bottle of water. It just seemed like such a chore for her! By Day Three, she decided if she couldn’t even drink 16 ounces, she knew 50 ounces was out of the question. She decided drinking water wasn’t for her and she quit all together. Sound familiar?
When we start a new habit, we tend to feel like we have to “go big or go home”. That often sets us up for failure.
When my client told me her story, we made a “water goal” for the smallest amount she knew she could drink, while still making it meaningful for her. She knew without a doubt she could drink 8 ounces a day and that was a meaningful amount for her.
Guess what happened? On the days her motivation was higher, she drank more, but she knew she only had to drink 8 ounces. Suddenly, it wasn’t difficult anymore. Drinking 8 ounces was a breeze and she felt like she was getting “extra credit” if she drank more. By the end of the second week, she was consistently drinking 32 ounces and had made this a new habit in her life.
I’ve seen a big connection between success and motivation in my clients. When they have success, they are motivated to move forward in ways they never had before.
Try choosing a behavior this week that you want to do. Break it down into the smallest step you know you will do, but make sure it still has meaning for you. Play around with it. Have fun and be curious.
Remember that creating a habit is not about willpower — it’s a skill.
Don’t get discouraged if it doesn’t work the first time. You would never expect to play the piano without first learning how and practicing, right? So treat habit creation the same. Learn how to create a habit successfully, then practice, practice, practice.
Stay tuned for a future blog about the “prompt”, or cue, that is the third part of the Tiny Habits magic.
Does this seem too overwhelming? If so, click here to schedule a free session to help you move toward that new and healthier you.
Let’s change together!
